Tuesday, November 02, 2004

Calm Before the Storm

So, today is the "storm"... who will win, Bush or Kerry? That's rhetorical. We'll know soon enough, even if it's several weeks from now... Nevertheless, soon enough. And soon enough, my many stressors will resurface full-throttle. I will be busy at work, travel briefly, lose some sleep, throw a baby shower, lose my job, move, search for a new job, and buy a house. I have no fear that the storm inside me will continue to rage.

But right now, I'm focussing on the calm. I had an enlightening experience this weekend. I finally took a step back, slowed down, took in the nature, had some time of self-reflection, and just existed in the moment. I sat on the beach on a beautiful fall day with warm, sunny weather I could only hope for in California. It took 32 years, but I finally really appreciated the California that I'm leaving. And I sat in the sand and felt it between my fingers, and let the breeze whip through my hair, sun beaming on my face, smelling the sea air. And I felt a peace and calm unlike any other I've known. I actually relaxed doing nothing - impossible for me, I thought, until that moment. And I watched the sailboats and the kayakers and surfers. I saw the pelicans dive for food. I watched the sun start to set. And I sat there, a tranquility almost overwhelming if it can be described that way.


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